The spit and image

let's just say we look a like.

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Oprah is going to hell.
Danielle Blue
I get like a million e-mails from my older cousins like every day. They're all like "FWD: God told me to tell you this"; "FWD: "Things to know about your Dentist!"; "FWD: INTERESTING!"; "FWD: BEWARE OF THE RAPIST" but some of the stuff is mad random.. like "FWD: 10 THINGS THAT ARE BETTER THAN MEN!" and "FWD: THINGS TO TRY..IN BED" . Like c'monnn guys! I'm 20..yall are like 40. Most things to me are better than men. I could probably just think of 1000 right now (glasses, shoes, candy, cars, turtles, fish, eyeballs, bananas, chiba,facebook, myspace). And I might try.. different pajamas in bed?

It's all Oprah's fault. I was watching today, and it was like "FIND YOUR SEXPOT!"
So the conversation went like this:
Me:"Mom, what the hell is a Sexpot?"
Mom:"A person who is smoking pot while having sex"
Me: "What? No."
Mom: "Yes, and Oprah's going to hell."

And, well. Yes, she should have. Because that episode ruined my life. My mom was doing "Sexpot excercises." Terrible. But this wasn't even the worst part.

Me: "Oh God.. this is terrible why the heck would you watch this?"
Mom: "You NEED to watch this! Don't you wanna know how to keep a man?"
Me: "I'm telling grandma"
Mom: "She's gonna say the same thing! WHAT DO YA WANT EM FOR!*"

* Okay, my grandma commented on my cousin's boyfriend who had erectile dysfunction.
My mom told my grandma, and my grandmother said to my mom.. "What!? IT doesn't WORK!? WELL WHAT DOES SHE WANT EM FOR!?"

I don't wanna know this about my family. I just assume that they don't have sexual organs.

Yeah. Those are all of my thoughts.

*Much Lovin*

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Other Danielle I just want you to know I for real laughed out loud for like 10 seconds when reading your first paragraph.

different pajamas ... LMAO

I've found that as you get older the female members of your family become more open and comfortable talking about sex around you. Just wait until they give you pointers and ask you about your sex life. Not fun at all.

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